an easy death

at the end
of 33 years of following Your Abba
thru
the tangle of our sin-shattered world
our mangled lives
our broken bodies
our over-powered spirits
always giving in...to Your Abba's leading...
in word
in deed
in heart
after the dark-of-night-struggle
     with the enormous bulk of our sin-load...
after never really considering DIS-obeying
     Your Abba's lead...
after begging
     for another way
     for any other alternative...
the dying
was easy...
until the dark descended like a midnight
on Your heart & ours.
at noon.
then
the heart that always listened first
before speaking...
the soul that always watched Your Abba
for a clue before acting...
pushed thru the DARKest DARK
to offer up Your Own Spirit
to Your for--the-first-time-ever silent Abba
breaking 
the DARK.
our sin.
death.
into pieces.

our hosanna-prayer-hopes
came true.
real.
forevermore.

these words #3

these words
on the screen
burn
more than electricity,
Lord.

not rising to the level of
poetry
instead they pray
their way into the
deep
inside my heart
then...they come
to You, Jesus.

they burn me
deep inside.

it is a good burn...
making me into
more
than i already am...
instead of
less.

is this how the bush
felt?
the one that
moses saw on mt. horeb?

turn me into
flame!

i'm okay with being
nothing
more
or
less
than flame.

these pages #2

these words
on pages electric
burn
the air i breathe,
Lord.

they are not poetry
instead they are
prayer
visible enough to be spoken
like my heart should say
them
to You, Jesus.

let them burn me
from the inside
out
into a shape
able
to be with You
in places ELECTRIC
with Your Presence.

i want to be like You
in every way
conceivable.

should my words
burn
none other than
me
may they burn me
brightly...
may they
turn me into
flame!

scars #4 (John 20:27)

why?

why, Lord?

why did You
let us get
to You?

you didn't have to...
i imagine that things
were probably going rather
well in heaven
without us,
Lord.

but...You noticed
us.
you took pity on us...
showing up
so much like us
that Your scars looked
just like ours.

except deeper...
each inscribed by love for
us...
none of them
a result of just looking
the wrong way...at
the wrong time.

love, grace & truth...
all & each
NEVER occur
here
accidentally...they
ALWAYS come from
a choice.

so i guess that means
You chose
freely
each one of Your scars...
didn't You,
Lord?

scars #3 (John 20:27)

are people themselves
ever
scars?

they do leave their
marks on
our bodies
our hearts
our histories.

are we Your
scars,
Lord?

when You look
at us...
do You think that?

when You look
at us...
do You mostly see
your pain
or
do You see
our story...
with You in it?

i think the latter,
to be the truest,
Lord.

scars #2 (John 20:27)

when You
look at the body
You lived in
for our sakes
so we could
see
You down here…
what do You
see?

remember?

do You
remember
the names
the ranks
the faces of Your
torturers?

do You
remember
the pain You
endured…for us?

after all, those scars
identify
you as the
ONE
Who is FULL
of grace
and
of truth.

scars #1 (John 20:27)

the marks on
our bodies
tell
our story in a way
nothing else
can.

past pain...
hurt,
cuts,
bruises,
bones broken,
burns & scrapes...
all
leave their mark...

am i right,
Lord?

what about
Your scars?

what do YOU
remember
about them,
Lord?

worship by grenade (Iraq)

is not worship
focusing on the real worth
of something?
of someone?

a man
falls on a live grenade
saving
his friends lives
&
losing
his own.

what greater love?
what deeper worship
is there than this,
Lord?

is love
worship?

does real love
always
lead to ultimate worship,
Lord?

You should know.

Abba's Passion

Lord,
Your Abba renews His passion
to save
to forgive
to give gifts
every morning even as He
renews our sight
with the sun's first light.

fresh mercy
fresh love
fresh life
each day as dawn breaks
a NEW gift
from the hand
and center of the heart of
our Heavenly Abba.